Lingam and Yoni Massage: A Safe Sex, Antiwar, and Economic Recovery Tool by P.C. Anders

Lingam and Yoni Massage: A Safe Sex, Antiwar, and Economic Recovery Tool

By P.C. Anders

  • Release Date: 2013-01-29
  • Genre: Commedia
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Un-massaged penises cause more than half the world’s problems--67%, to be precise; just one of them, the Big One, causes 62%. Not only that, neglected yonis cause the remaining 33%. The answer? This short book argues that constitutionally mandated daily lingam and yoni massages for all of America's and the world's top leaders and policy makers would pacify the war-mongerers by helping them get in touch with their "Inner Clitorises." Not only would this save the world from wars and economic disaster, it would increase total happiness and reduce global warming and its effects, such as catastrophic hurricanes. The book ends with an E.L. James quote and a Sumerian poem in support of its demand for Justice for All Yonis; and Peace to all owners of lingams and yonis.

This short book is for the Australian guy who laughed for two minutes just on hearing the title. Light on technical content, and tilted heavily towards priapic humor and satire, it is meant to be an endorphin-releasing gift of laughter: to yourself or to others. Warning: Not for puritanical or uptight adults, children, or Martians.